My wise daughter recently taught me the term “internalized capitalism.” It’s an interesting concept. We judge ourselves in terms of the perceived values of capitalism. This includes competition with winners and losers, specific ideas of success and failure (money and power-related), and fear-based perceptions of prosperity and poverty. It’s a market-driven consciousness, in which work and “productivity” are valued, while rest and relaxation are considered lazy. The restorative experiences of creating, playing, exploring, and de-stressing are discounted as unproductive, except in the rare cases of great financial success in a field, such as cooking, art, sports, travel.
That’s a lot of unhealthy and unpleasant pressure on a person, even for those that function well under the culture's terms. For one thing, it's hard to feel satisfied, or to know you are "enough." But since the most harmful aspect of that pressure comes from within, it can be healed. Just because the culture accepts the terms of a commerce-focused life, where money rules and all else is failure, it doesn’t mean you have to accept this detrimental approach to your own sweet, precious, and short life.
Self-care is critical to life satisfaction and well being. Breathing is critical. Tending to the mind-body construct in a loving, kind, and committed way is critical. And truly, relaxation is critical.
Life can be an exciting, stimulating affair. But running and rushing around this planet in a state of stress is proven to be unhealthy. Sitting with poor posture all day (and night) damages the body. While work may be a necessary part of a life, there is opportunity to grow, learn, and expand in every moment and every situation. Even on the job, there is an option of practicing breath, posture, kindness, and all the other beneficial yogic practices. Any place and any situation provide a chance to practice awareness of yourself and the moment. If you are alive, there is opportunity to evolve. But it must be done on your terms, without the harsh judgement of an unhealthy society clouding your internal experience.
In reflection, my life couldn’t meet the expectations of this commercial-focused approach. I drifted around without a plan. I was unfocused in my goals. I wonder now if that was because the culture said my goals were not market-supported, and I internalized that to mean I wasn't good enough to pursue my dreams. I wasn’t financially stable, or so I thought. Internalized capitalism told me I was a failure. Untangling that confusion has brought me to a beautiful, affirming realization.
Life took care of me. Wisdom guided me. I was always fed, housed, and clothed well. I was always surrounded by loving, laughing friends and family—even when I was deeply confused by the illusion of loneliness. I traveled a lot and had many fun adventures for very little money. I’m convinced that was because I always said yes to every opportunity, and that approach seemed to serve me well.
The point is: I was always on the right path--even when I was completely confused and believed I was somehow doing life wrong. I thought I was doing life wrong because I was looking outside myself, comparing myself, resisting the reality of my own nature and my own wisdom.
It’s not possible to be on the wrong path. Life is unfolding perfectly, because this is how it is unfolding. Every wrong turn is the right turn. Every mistake brings a gift of understanding. Every obstacle provides an opportunity. Every contraction or crisis provides a fresh start, a re-birth.
For that matter, every moment offers a fresh start, a clean slate. Every moment offers the chance to return to stillness, to rest, and to experience wide open freedom. That is an abundant luxury which no money can buy.
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